Monday, May 18, 2009


Saturday was what i thought it would be, a fucking nightmare! It started as i thought it would, MILFH at the head of the table, even though it was FIL's birthday. Then there was SP's whole family around her. He has 3 brothers and 1 sister, and they are all fucked up like there mum.
His eldest brother is divorced and lives with them, he came for a month and ten months later he is still there. He really is a pain in the arse, he has 2 pints he is annoying, 3 pints and hes pissed up, 4 pints and hes trying to garb you all over, and 5 pints and hes fighting anybody.
The next one, keeps away from his parents unless its a birthday or mothers/fathers day, a dark horse but very wise.
His sister is a first class bitch, she always gives you the look, you know the one where she starts at the top, down to the bottom and then just sneers, yes she is a single woman with a different bloke every time you see her and wears all fancy gear and well, i don't but every time you get a comment, on Saturday it was you look well, out on weight? i smiled and stood there wishing i could scream at her telling her to fuck off!
The other brother is a complete arse, left his two sons and wife for another woman and now flaunts that he is a single man again- doesn't go down well with the woman he has at the moment as she wants to drag him down the aisle as quick as possible.
The whole family is fucked up and we were sat at the bottom of the table.
SP wasn't talking to me as he was listening to what the others were saying and every time i tried he just nodded his head, not listening and then carried on ignoring me, i was pissed off not drinking and spent the night entertaining the kids, they were fed up and so was I.
As the night wore on they got more pissed up, I got more pissed off. I told SP we wanted to go, and it was always in a minute, in a minute.
I waited half an hour, and decided enough was enough,got up the kids and said thank you for the meal to MILFH , happy birthday to FIL and went to leave, by this time SP had decided he had had enough and was coming home too, wise choice since i was the only one not drinking, even though the others had brought there cars, and from previous experience never seemed to bother with the don't drink and drive rule, from that only you can tell the whole family is fucked up.

As soon as we got in we went straight to bed, i was tired and all i wanted to do is sleep, I locked the doors and went to bed, glad it was all over....

well until the phone rang constantly 3 hours later. I didn't want to pick it up, i had a fear it was her, but then again it could be an emergency. Shit, i didn't know what to do, SP wouldn't answer it as he said it would only be for me anyway. bloody great, this is all i needed.
I picked it up, didn't say anything, and knew from the noise i could hear it was her pissed up, i put it down straight away, and just hoped she didn't realise i had pick it up, SP said i was ignorant for not speaking, i told him it was his mother so he talk to her, he didn't like that idea and when the phone rang again and again he went and pulled the plug out, complaining about how he did his head in, hmmmmm maybe it wasn't all bad then, maybe he realises his mum isn't so bloody great, here's hoping!


  1. There is some saying that goes 'You cant choose your family but thank god you can choose your friends'!

    Hope you got some good ones...RMx

  2. you poor thing, you need to move and fast, i hope your hubby is still on your wave length!oh you have a lovely blog award over on mine for you

  3. Hi there. Just found your blog and thought I'd leave a comment.
    Is it wrong that I completely loved your story? So lovely to know there are horror stories in other families other then my own!
    Wishing you peaceful days :)

  4. I just found your blog too and like ModernMom was riveted by the post and will be an avid reader from now on. What a bloody awful lot to have spend time with! I thought my family were crackers but that lot take the mick! Is it wrong that I am chortling with laughter at what SP means? Priceless!